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Monday Mayhem – Passionate advocacy: A calling for change

2 min

Monday Mayhem – Passionate advocacy: A calling for change

Help me to invoke the wisdom of those who have come before me and the wisdom of those I am here to lead. When I started thinking about Passionate Advocacy and what that means two questions came to mind. Where can you bring more love to your life? What needs to be cleared away for you to do it? I can often be found in church scribbling away when I am feeling extra inspired. The other day the woman preaching asked about our gifts. She said, “How do we receive the gifts of our t

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – So You Want To Be An Activist?

2 min

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – So You Want To Be An Activist?

You‘re mad. I‘m mad. We are all fucking mad. The world seems to have gone mad. What do you do when the world goes mad? You stand for something; you start in your little part of the world and create stability and reason so you and those around you can gain your footing. And once you’re on solid ground, you kick ass. But, it can’t be willy-nilly ass kicking. You can’t just go kicking ass all over the place. You will get tired. And beat up. And probably lost, because no one reme

Monday Mayhem – 3 things you can do to stop catastrophizing what is happening in America

2 min

Monday Mayhem – 3 things you can do to stop catastrophizing what is happening in America

It would be easy to become entirely overwhelmed from the moment we wake up. Just this past weekend I was grateful I meditated before I checked my Twitter Feed. White boys torturing Native American Elders put my panties into bunch there is no question (read more about it here). I could hardly formulate a sentence. Action paralysis is real. How we react to it is the kicker. We talk inside our heads until we can’t breathe. We spin out all sorts of scenarios that are built on a

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – When your hate mail is a backhanded HELL YES!

3 min

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – When your hate mail is a backhanded HELL YES!

Tomorrow and Saturday I am co-facilitating a workshop with anyone from our community that wants to participate. There was even a nice little article in the paper about it that one of the ladies from church emailed me so I wouldn’t miss it. The homeless issue in Corvallis is DIVISIVE. There is no real shelter for those finding themselves without homes. There is no real consensus about how to move forward. A few days ago I received the following email that was forwarded to me

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – We are witnessing the gaslighting of an entire nation

2 min

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – We are witnessing the gaslighting of an entire nation

There will be many moments in our lives where we will be presented with the opportunity to make a difference in someone else’s life. It is that presentation that creates space for us to expand our soul, grow love in our hearts, and tap into the intuitive energy that flows deep in our veins. Most people won’t take this opportunity. For most people it will seem too daunting, too difficult, too uncomfortable. And so…the moment quickly passes us by. Until the next time, because t

Monday Mayhem – Mutilating the Patriarchy

2 min

Monday Mayhem – Mutilating the Patriarchy

Hello loves, I woke up this morning and wanted to write you a letter about advocacy. What is advocacy all about anyway? Why should we even do it? What does it matter? And where in the crap do we find daily motivation to keep going in 2018? Merriam-Webster defines mayhem as, “willful, permanent, crippling mutilation”. I for one super love the idea of permanently mutilating the patriarchy. It sounds so delicious. It is the perfect reason to engage in advocacy. Advocacy is abou

Monday Mayhem – Hold the excuses

1 min

Monday Mayhem – Hold the excuses

I don’t have time. I don’t have the answers. I don’t have the education. I don’t have the training. I don’t know the definition. No one will believe me. No one will take me seriously. I am too young. I am too old. Someone else is already doing that, I am just so sure. People will be mean to me. People will yell at me. People will troll me. People will criticize me. People will think I am stupid. Y’ALL…stop it with the excuses already. Revolutions don’t start with

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – Balance is crap

3 min

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – Balance is crap

I just did an AMAZING workshop in Holyoke, MA called Fanning the Flames! It is a Bird Girl Industries special event to help women tap into their passion to make a difference in their OWN communities! What I love about these workshops is that I get to go into places all over the country and talk to women in their own spaces, hear their stories, and give them amazeballs ideas to help them find their voice and speak their own truth. 9 out of 10 times when I am doing a workshop w

Monday Mayhem – Sometimes you’ve gotta encourage yourself

1 min

Monday Mayhem – Sometimes you’ve gotta encourage yourself

Holy crap…advocacy is hard. What happens when you speak out against the status quo isn’t pretty. Especially if you are a woman. I mean…look at what the right wing is doing to Emma Gonzalez for speaking out against gun violence. Her male counterparts aren’t getting nearly the amount of grief that she is. Engaging in advocacy can be complicated on the best of days under the best of circumstances. As we now know…2018 is complicated like every 5 minutes…and every 3 minutes it b

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – Gun Reform: A Conversation with my Teenager

2 min

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – Gun Reform: A Conversation with my Teenager

My 16 year old daughter Katelynn and I just did a FB live together about her #MarchForOurLives walkout this week. It was amazing to hear her thoughts about gun reform because we had never discussed it before. She has some great wisdom that she wants to share with all of you: Me: Do you think that kids that seem to be hurting could use a hug and someone to acknowledge their pain? How do you decide who just needs a hug and a “how’re you?” And who needs to be reported for their

Monday Mayhem – If all else fails mom says the water in the back of the toilet is clean

3 min

Monday Mayhem – If all else fails mom says the water in the back of the toilet is clean

Last week I was giving a lecture about “toxic debt” and during the Q&A discussion a member of the audience wondered why we weren’t talking about the idea of “living within your means”. Let me tell you, my inside voice was like, “For reals? After all the data I just presented this is where we are going?” But I didn’t…I finessed a genius answer, deftly moved on to another question, and then marinated long and hard in the notion that our systems are still set up on the fictional

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – My Struggle as a Stepmother

2 min

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – My Struggle as a Stepmother

It is a compulsion. A calling. A drive. The need to change the world for the better. The impulse to improve the community for everyone. It thrums through the blood in my veins. It resonates down deep into the tenor of my soul. I have never not heard the siren song of the call for justice. And yet… I can advocate for others but advocating for myself is an entirely different story, especially in my capacity as a parent. I have been raising three children since Sean was 18

Roadblocks, justice, and finding your calling – Monday Mayhem

2 min

Roadblocks, justice, and finding your calling – Monday Mayhem

When we engage in advocacy and speak our truth, sometimes we hit a major roadblock. Mine is my “good girl”. She is an expert at saying, “shhhhhh, be quiet, sit down and shut up before someone sees you.” Feeding into this mindset can stop us from taking action. When women engage in advocacy and speak our truth, sometimes we are told we are wrong and women really hate being told we are wrong. Feeding into this mindset can stop us from taking action. Pitting women against other

Monday Mayhem – Can we not be so hateful towards Republican women?

3 min

Monday Mayhem – Can we not be so hateful towards Republican women?

I spend a big chunk of my life on Twitter and let me just say, this is not my grandma’s GOP and this hateful, angry speech towards other women is not going to help a gosh darned thing. The resisterhood doesn’t work without sisterhood. About one million years ago – give or take 20 years – I was assigned Susan Faludi’s “Backlash” as a textbook in a women’s studies class at the University of Utah. As a relatively privileged white girl in Utah, it was an eye opening reader to be

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – Why I am opposed to the legalization of marijuana

3 min

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – Why I am opposed to the legalization of marijuana

I am opposed to the legalization of marijuana. I have been having this argument for years. This is not my first rodeo. You might think it is because I have watched addiction rip out the hearts of the three children I am helping to raise. Perhaps it is because you assume this Utah girl is a prude when it comes to drugs. Maybe it is the increase in ER visits in Colorado because kiddos ate brownies and cookies their parents accidentally left in their reach. Potentially you thi

10 Things I Wouldn’t Have Done if I Stayed Afraid of CRITICISM!

3 min

10 Things I Wouldn’t Have Done if I Stayed Afraid of CRITICISM!

10. Built a BOMB ASS following online! That has led to connections with: Magical Feminists Kick Ass Academics Gorgeous friendships Glorious politicians 9. Pursued and obtained a PhD! I had mediocre grades, nearly failed statistics, and was told that my work was irrelevant. 8. Gone to a therapist! I was going through post-divorce insanity back in 2010. Going to therapy meant that I had to look at my own failings and it also got me to start praying to something bigger than

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – Gratitude for the Activists

3 min

Eff Sh*t Up Friday – Gratitude for the Activists

I am grateful for activists. I receive lots of really incredible emails on a pretty regular basis. This week I received some remarkable messages that I think are pretty great. One was from a student of mine who read the chapter about “substance use” in our textbook and took exception with the language used. He emailed the authors of the textbook and got this response: “The textbook publisher emailed me a proof of the next edition’s chapter on addiction asking me to look it ov

Monday Mayhem – Invitation to Risk

3 min

Monday Mayhem – Invitation to Risk

I have a tattoo on my back that says “forward out of darkness, forward into light”. I got it after Utah state legislator LaVar Christensen killed the first bill I ever wrote in 2004. It is part of the motto the suffragettes sewed on their banners when they marched for the 19th Amendment. National Woman’s Party collection My tattoo reminds me that oftentimes, especially when it comes to policy, things don’t often come easily but with persistence they do come. Let me say that a

Monday Mayhem – Roy Moore

3 min

Monday Mayhem – Roy Moore

“As our world reacts to injustice in forms of control, I as a follower of Jesus will react in forms of uncontrollable love.” Yes y’all heard that right, I just threw you a quote about Jesus. I know I know – y’all just spit out your beverages and fell out of your chair. Follow me here if you will. One of the things that has been happening lately is all or nothing thinking. Black & white thinking is my quicksand, it is my trap, and I often fall head first right into it. On Satu

Little Miss Eff Sh*t Up

9 min

Little Miss Eff Sh*t Up

Last week I posted a blog about the sexual harassment that has occurred at the USC School of Social Work. One of my former professors has been found guilty of sexual harassment involving several colleagues that I respect and admire. His colleagues have spoken out. The MSW students have spoken out. And the PhD students have issued a response. Three groups critical to the success of the USC Suzanne Dworak-Peck School of Social work have spoken begging for action that will prote